Where you stand affects what you see

David Macaulay, artist and award-winning author, makes me wonder about our large complex story, life. He uses his power as an illustrator to question assumptions and see familiar buildings in unusual ways. It is the first time, for example, that I learned about the phrase "worm's eye view." He used this to describe, as you can probably guess, the view of a building from the ground level. I know only the phrase "bird's eye-view" before I visited the National Building Museum at Judiciary Square today.

His theme "Where you stand affects what you see" invited me to question my assumptions about living (on earth), buildings in the big city, learning, working, making mistakes, volunteering, relationships, and other activities in life where I might not usually apply this sentence. Your perspective depends upon where you stand in every situation, and you should be able to move around to see things from all dimensions.

I am struck by the above sentence. I like to take pictures of light and lines in between the buildings . Instead of taking the front of places and buildings, I usually run to the sides and the backs and try to navigate corners where people might pay little attention to, except perhaps the garbage man who comes regularly to take trash away.

Every day, I find the corners between buildings very fascinating and feel they are inviting areas to reflect upon, even to stand for a few minutes and meditate. I try to see those areas from the "worm's eye view" as David suggests and capture those moments into my daily experience.

I walk to work, walk to the markets, walk to the museums and stop at every single corner where public space permits and try to look at the world with a changing perspective.

David Macaulay wrote the following powerful thought - "I honestly think all of us would be better off if everyone took the time to draw, if for no other reason than the better we see, the more inevitable curiosity becomes. A lack of curiosity is the first step towards visual illiteracy -and by that I mean not really seeing what is going on around us." (1991)

I hope where you stand affects what you see in the world and that you will also be able to change your perspectives accordingly.

I need to go drawing,

bye bye.

TAN

A small slice of LIFE!

Wow ... I must say that I have had several food-inspired moments recently and cannot help but write them down. And I want to call it, "a small slice of life" as the singer, Greta Gertler expressed in her latest album - http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=18372424

I have a few Thai friends in DC (well, in America particularly) and one of my favorite friends is Sombat, a middle-aged Thai man who works as a Chef at a Thai restaurant in Falls Church, Virginia.

We met yesterday on his only day off, for a coffee and my first question for him was, "how is the kitchen?" He looked at me with a grim smile, "busy, boring, and tiring."

"Don't you like what you are doing? I am jealous at you, I want to be a chef," I exclaimed and almost scolded him for his answer. Why am I so quick on passing judgement on my friend? Who am I?

Sombat told me that his life is so uninteresting. The routine goes like this - he wakes up, goes to the restaurant, works from late morning till late night, comes home, sleeps, wakes up and starts the routine again, 6 days a week. Being in the kitchen, he cooks the same Pad Thai over and over and over. He makes me believe that his life is so crappy and I should't even start thinking of doing anything like what he is doing.

He asked me, "Don't you enjoy being a director?" His question really made my coffee more bitter than its actual taste. I told him that i was so stressed out with work and that I had reached the point in which I want to do nothing. (Basically, I was overworked and am waiting for a wonderful break).

Sombat told me that I don't want to work like him, on labor-intensive tasks, with no thinking required. I don't want to work 12 hours a day, 6 days a week, standing in the kitchen, cooking all the time. Even though I could cook and eat any Thai food that I crave, it would not be the core of a balanced life.

He concluded that we need a happy medium, that we need to be with family, enjoy a balance of work, live in a warmer place, and have enough independence to live life the way we want to. He kept telling me, "This is America, not Thailand, and this is not my home." I agreed with him but I am also trying to live in the present. Life is already tough enough, so if I add too much worries it won't help things.

We imagine that other people seem to have a better/richer and/or healthier life than we have, and in fact everyone faces their own struggles.

An hour passed and I had so much fun exchanging viewpoints, and arguing with Sombat, that we concluded two things: he doesn't want to be a director and I don't (think) that I want to be a chef. We will go back to what we are doing and try to find a happy medium, a well-balanced life, and we will reevaluate again whether this is something for real or just another slice.

A small slice of life in which we see each piece's deliciousness. The art of chewing is the key.

TAN

Street Noodles

I was in awe when the big bowl of my favorite noodle soup (guaytiew krae) was served to me in Arlington, Virginia.

This joy cannot be replaced or compared.

After months and months in America, it has been hard to imagine that I will have a chance to enjoy Thai food the way it is supposed to be cooked, as opposed to Thai-American food in which the authentic taste is oftentimes compromised by Western sensitivity to Thai spice levels and a lack of fresh ingredients.

It is pure joy when you know the authentic taste of something, and my enjoyment of this bowl brought about a series of memories. The noodle which I enjoyed on the streets of Bangkok was replicated here at Bangkok 54, a huge Thai grocery store in Virginia. The world is connected for me now.

The "street" noodles with their authentic taste is a simple joy that I can find in America.

TAN

$1.25 on a Saturday Morning

$1.25 was the bus fare in DC last year. (It is now $1.35 if you use cash). I usually take a bus, D2, from my apartment to work. It takes between 20-30 minutes depending on the time of day.

It was early Saturday morning, Jan 5, 2008, when I had the first new volunteer training of the year. I was so exhausted from the long weeks of preparation, so excited and nervous about training 40 new volunteers, so sleepy to get ready for this saturday that my mind wandered. I lacked focus and attentiveness. Still, I was trying to make sure that I would be ready to complete my duty, beautifully.

I left home early, left a half coffee in a big mug, ran to the bus stop with all my training plans in the cotton bag. It was around 6.30 a.m.

The D2 bus came right as I ran up to the bus stop, and I placed my farecard on the card reader as I usually do. It didn't read and made a weird noise that meant, "your balance is zero." I knew that I might be in trouble. I tried to find $1.25 in my wallet. I had no cash. I had no time to get cash from the ATM.

I told the driver, "sorry, I have no cash ..." (awkward silence between the driver and I)

"You don't have $1.25?" the driver asked bluntly.

"No, no money, what should I do?" I thought that he would just let me sit and tell me to forget about it. He asked again, "no money?"

A middle aged man, sitting in the middle seat, called to me and said, "Ma'am, here is $1.25, take it." I was so excited and politely grabbed that money and put it in the reader.

What a random kindness that was. We started to chat and I kept thanking him for his kindness. We exchanged small talk. "Where are you from?" This popular question came up. "Thailand. I am Thai. My husband is a student at American University. That is why I am in DC now." I answered with a big smile.

He told me that his wife is Mongolian. I was so excited and asked him what she did. "Well, it is 6:45 a.m. She probably was sleeping when I left home.'" Laughter filled the air. The bus driver kept driving sternly ahead.

It doesn't matter if you have had a long, stressful time. You must remember to keep a good balance and that life will grow because you know when and how to "let it go."

TAN

A Chance to Try

My husband read a quote for me that basically says something like "You will never fail if at least you try. " Does this simple statement make you think of any of your previous experiences or current situation?

I immediately stop and take a long, deep breath.

Supposing that all of my initiatives at work fail, at least I can try to initiate things.

If my living abroad experience doesn't work out as well as I want it to be, at least I can try to understand living out of my comfort zone.

If I fail to lose weight, at least I can try to treat myself to a healthy diet.

If I cannot go as far as my dreams want to go, at least I can try to dream.

If I will not accomplish the big goals in life (whatever they are), at least I can try to take care of my small, achievable goal (s).

If I cannot write as beautifully as my heart wants to, at least I can try to keep writing.

If I cannot be a good mom, at least I can try to be a good daughter.

If I fail to do good to others, at least I can try to make an effort to think good thoughts.

If you fail to recognize your values, at least you can try to start thinking about that now.

Thank you everyone who gives me a chance to try.

TAN

Stillness

This is a feeling of conflict and you have to experience that in order to understand it.

Recently, my work has taught me many lessons particularly how to handle conflict(s)/stress.

I have worked for more than 12 hours a day for more than two weeks, consecutively. My mind was heavily engaged with my immediate tasks and my body told me to take a break, but I didn't listen.

Consequently I lost my balance.

I am trying to maintain my stillness amidst the chaos, transition and changes. Why do all of these words occur at the same time? Is there a strong stillness in the midst of the chaos?

I suddenly feel overwhelmed by work because I lost my stillness, even though I want to believe that it is still there.

TAN